So you forgot to invite someone to your wedding, now what?

It happens to the best of us. You’re planning your wedding and you get so caught up in the guest list that you forget to invite someone. So, what’s the etiquette in this situation? Do you send them a late invite, do you call them and beg for forgiveness or maybe you just never speak to them again, problem solved, right? Uh, probably not, but don’t fret! Here are a few things to consider if you find yourself in this predicament.

Prevention –

Prepare your invitations super early, like unreasonably early so you have time to go over the invite list and triple check you didn’t forget anyone. Have a family member from each side and a friend check it over to make sure no one has been left out. Have extra invitations on hand in case you do forget someone or have to invite new people that come into your life, this will save you the hassle of ordering more later.

When it comes to mailing out wedding invitations, the earlier the better. Getting your invitations in the mail at least eight weeks before your wedding day ensures that your guests have plenty of time to rsvp, clear their schedules and make travel arrangements, if necessary.

If you’re DIYing your invitations or working with a calligrapher, be sure to give yourself enough time to account for any potential delays. It’s always better to err on the side of caution when it comes to wedding planning!

Before the wedding –

First of all, don’t panic! There are a few things you can do to make sure that person feels included and special on your big day.

• The first thing you want to do is get the invite in the mail ASAP! It can be tempting to try and cover up your mistake with a little white lie such as the invitation got lost in the mail but don’t do it! Honesty is definitely the way to go here, you’ll feel much better in the end.

• You may want to include a personal note apologizing for the oversight and letting them know how much you would love it if they could attend your wedding.

• If you’ve done engagement photos, including a photo is a nice added touch .

• See if you can include them in some of the festivities leading up to the big day, like the rehearsal dinner or a pre-wedding brunch. This will help them feel like they’re part of the wedding even if they’re not attending the actual ceremony.

Generally, don’t sweat it. If they’re your friends, they’ll be understanding of your stress levels and will be delighted to share your special day with you.

After the wedding –

It’s the morning after your wedding and you realize that you forgot to invite one of your closest friends. You feel awful and want to make it up to them. Here are a few ways to make it up to someone that you forgot to invite to your wedding.

• First, reach out to them as soon as possible. Again, don’t lie, just be honest and let them know how sorry you are and that you would love to talk to them. If they’re available, set up a time for a phone call or video chat. If not, send them a handwritten letter expressing your thoughts.

• You may also want to invite them to any post-wedding celebrations you may have planned, such as an after party or brunch with family and friends. This is a great way to include them in the festivities and make up for not having them at the wedding itself.

• Finally, send them a thoughtful gift.

It’s clear that forgetting to invite a friend or family member to your wedding can have serious consequences. If you are in this situation, it is important to take action quickly and reach out to the person you forgot to invite. With a sincere apology and an explanation of the situation, you can often repair the relationship and avoid any further damage.